July 23, 2008

FInishing my American Chapter...

..with an impossible schedule, an incredible cake convention, lots of shopping...resulting in sleepless nights of packing and unpacking of luggage.
In the midst of my attempt to bid all my friends goodbye with late nights of drinks and harmless fun; I got up at 6am each morning to make it to the ICES convention on time. Sleep was not a necessity. It was a luxury I couldn't afford that weekend. I used as many hours I could from my 24 each day.

This morning I finally cleared my entire apartment into drawstring trash bags filled with junk I wished I could take on the plane with me. The hardest part of packing was giving away tiny trinkets such as blankets; pillows, cutlery, mugs and the sort. I had a vivid memory of living with Katie and Mindy in every item. I can't say I won't miss them ever so dearly; You know times when you wished you could go back and spend more time with your friends? When you knew they were about to leave... possibly forever?..
Tying up lose ends in a mad rush at 6am helped take my mind off unnecessary emotion. Lucky me; I hate emotions.
I owe a big thank you to David and Kassy for keeping me sane the past weekend. I don't know what I would have done to myself without them. I had Kassy keeping the pressure there for me to pack and organize quicker and David to remind me constantly that it was going to be just fine. Going back and forth between "Look at the stuff you need to do?!" and "Don't worry, you'll make it there on time" really did help balance my focus. They both sent me off with hugs, I walked away through security with a rush of adrenaline... it's a new chapter in my life; and those were my first steps. In the next 27 hours; I was going to have different goals and bigger things to achieve. I wasn't so sure at that point if it was ready to let them go. I turned around to glance at them; they waved me off knowingly, I could sense they believed in me more than I did myself. I felt a tad bit ashamed of my lack of confidence in the matter.... but I realized that was who I am. My ability to progressively move forward is highly dependent on the confidence I fed off of others around me. I suppose that also is partially the reason why I share my thoughts and work in this journal of mine, for confirmation of my improvements through the years. I'm not certain where I would be without having began blogging 2 years ago; I'm not even certain if I was born a chef of any sort! It just happened to work out this way. In all honesty; everything fell into place for me a little to quick for comfort.Walking alone through the quiet halls of the Incheon airport in Seoul allowed me to realize how far I've come on my own. Dragging with me; a ridiculous 20kg backpack on my shoulders; I'm now returning home wiser, stronger and more ready than ever.I can't wait for morning!...when my 27 hour transition between flights are over and I'm safely tucked away in a place I used to call home.

I plop my bags down with a heaving sigh...glanced around me...the walls do look different... things feel different in my hands...the furniture odours are different and the house reminds me vaguely of my younger days. I've certainly changed lots myself; but it's alright... I'm sure I'll work it out eventually. :) There's no place better than home, right?
First thing tomorrow I'll be unpacking, publishing this...and working on sharing with everyone the many intriguing discoveries I've made at the ICES convention last weekend! I've taken some brilliant photographs which depict lots about the knowledge and skills shared by decorators around the world.

13 comments:

Sarah said...

Su, it's been amazing to watch your journey over the last year or two. It's unbelievable what you've accomplished! I hope you're as proud of yourself as you deserve to be. And even though the next steps seem big and scary, maybe it's comforting to know that all of us are behind you and so confident that you'll be a total success yet again!

Ashley Daddy and Mummy said...

Welcome home dear Suyin. I've been following your blog and really want to commend you for following your heart and your dreams. The US Chapter is but a stepping stone to BIGGER aspirations to come, I'm sure so keep your spirits high girl!

Giorgia said...

Home sweet home?

Cutie said...

Well, it will be good to be home where you can be by your parents' side all the time. It may be hard but at least the experience u went through in your life is awesome and it's something which you can share to your kids in future. I think you will be really successful in future. Hey, do open a shop in Malaysia. I believe you have something in mind isn't it. Hehe... Take care and all the best!

Anonymous said...

hi dear,
if you could recall, we almost met here in Orlando. i do apologize for not being able to schedule a meet-up with you. i was and still am as busy as a bee. too busy with my MBA and relatives over here at my place. i wished we met. anyways, welcome home and hope you had a pleasant stay here in the States. do keep in touch and look out for my email. miss u dear, though we've not met :D

sweet delight said...

Su, thank you for sharing your journey with us and your experiences in the States. You have a great talent and will go far! Good luck in this new chapter in your life and career!

Hany said...

Hi Su! Wish you all the best for your next journey! I'll continue following you through this blog ^_^. You are truly inspirational. I hope I can meet you some day ^_^.

Krizia said...

Hi Su!

I've been reading your blog for the past few months now and you are so inspiring! Sometimes I wish I could drop my life and just do everything that you're doing. That's why I'm glad you share your stories w/ us, because in a way, I can live them through you.

Good luck, and keep exploring the world! I'll be here reading about it ^_^

Come back to the US soon!

<3Krizia

Anonymous said...

Hi Su, Welcome home! Have been following your journey from Australia to Malaysia to US and back to Malaysia! It was a wonderful experience!

I wish that i could open up a new chapter in my life too... all i need is to take that one step forward.

Nevertheless all the best for the next chapter in life!

mantou debauchery said...

su, i've been following your blog for a long time now and i want you to know you've been such an inspiration to me whether it is regards to your baking and designs or your spontaneous way of living your life!

dont be afraid of those emotions i hope you are proud of yourself of what you have accomplished today because in a way haha we all live our dreams thru u!

embrace all that is to come and im looking forward to more from you!

lots of luck and love
kim

Anonymous said...

welcome home ^_^, waiting for your next step.

Katie... yeah! said...

ah Su - the US will surely miss you.. and so will I!!

Kiss the Malaysian sky for me, will you?? :)

Love!!

Bev said...

OMG !! you were in korea!!!
and you didn't tell me!!! shame shame on you su